PHQ-Nickname:
Wolfsbane
Halfquake:
The Chamber
Level:
1
Total kills:
64
Birthday:
00th 0000
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| Mood: | depressive |
| Type: | Diary entry |
| Added: | September 21st 2003, 05:28:04 |
| Visits: | 1272 |
| Series: | [ Amy's Journals... ] |
| Rating: | Not rated yet. |
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| Well, today was...well, rough. I can't find Lucius, and haven't been able to since last night. Maybe he just crawled back into the depths of my mind. I can't find him. I lost her today too. I noticed she is not dead. But I was so sad today. I felt as though she died in my arms. GOD DAMN. It was sad...She was trying to shove me away, trying to make me leave. Telling me things that will someday be known to Rick, but not yet. He will know someday. But, I asked her not to do a black spell, and when she walked into the other room, she collapsed. I heard her. I jumped off the couch and ran to her. She was on the floor, in a fetal position. I rolled her onto her back. She was laughing almost, not even scared. I knew what was happening. She explained it to me, because I was a little confused. She told me that she was going to phase out, but this time, she would not be coming back, and she would be taking Damien. She was going to take away all of his pain, save him from Damien. Well, she left, and I was just holding her and crying. It was weird. I guess you could say she died in my arms. Well, she has been resurrected from the dead. She's back now. She's not dead. But, I felt her go limp in my arms. I know she was just a manifestation. But, the body, went limp, if only for a while, until Rick came back. But, god, the look on his face when he knew she was gone. And the things she said to me, he will not know. And if he ever does know, it will not be for a while. I do not mean to hide this from him, but telling him now would just hurt him. I can't tell him. But the things she said and did. God it almost ripped out my heart. It was as if she had her hand in my chest and was trying to pull out my heart with that grip. But, it hurt, what she did. I will forgive her, I think I already do, but it will hurt me for a while. A LONG WHILE. Well, a lot has happened. I can't find Lucius, its bugging me, he's not coming out when he normally would. She's gone, or was, he's gone. I'm just sad beyond belief. I still have Rick, which is keeping me going. But, I lost them... |
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