PHQ-Nickname:
hollow
Halfquake:
Radical Perfection
Level:
21
Total kills:
711,304
Birthday:
September 25th 1985
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| Mood: | depressive |
| Type: | Story |
| Added: | January 10th 2005, 09:31:54 |
| Visits: | 1159 |
| Rating: | Not rated yet. |
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| Sometimes I feel like I am blind and dumb and insensible. Sometimes I just think everyone else is. Half of everyone else that is. If you get what I mean. I wonder, if I ' m numb, then when nothing happens to me, i still feel. Mostly pain. And anger, which is not the good kind but the resigned take you down with me kind, if you know that kind. Well, since the opposite of to love is to ignore, and hating is so close to loving, then the world is sapping me dry. I think I might have to just try to give out about how much it gives. How much half of it gives, that is, if you see my point. Of course, of course, of course, no one can blame half the world from ignoring one person for another half the world. Since that person ignores half the world for another one person. If you see where I ' m going with this, yeah? |
TheAwake
January 10th 2005, 10:57:49
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Hey....I wanted to comment but I was too confused to understand any of your lines in that situation...I hope I didnt destroy your hope for feedback with my...rant. It didnt feel good to post it that day but I had to put it down somewhere...
You know that youre not dumb or blind. Insensible...well maybe you just feel like this, I mean I really know what youre talking about but...I dont think one can be really insensible, at least not without having a lack of...mind, if you get the idea. One who thinks all day and writes down very complicated and thoughtful stories cant be totally untouched by the rest of the world...Its like if you wouldnt give a fuck, why even bother write about it? That doesnt fit.
About the Anger thats inside you, I may quote from the movie Natural Born Killers: "The Demon lives in here. Everyone's got the
demon. It feeds on their hate, it cuts, rapes,
kills...it's the alien man, it uses your
weakness, your fear...only the vicious survive. [...]
You know the only thing that kills the Demon?
...Love. That's why I know Mallory is my
salvation. She was teaching me how to love.
It's like being in the Garden of Eden..."
I think thats somehow true....if one feels alone and left out, the fault is often put upon the others and its hard to get rid of the hate thats caused by this. I dont know, I cant forget my hate most of the time, but to actually put it asleep I need someone else helping me...not really half of the world, but...
And...to give it would need to know you, dont ya think? |
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TheAwake
