PHQ-Nickname:
LordAsriel
Halfquake:
Garbage Fort
Level:
17
Total kills:
378,946
Birthday:
May 20th 1991
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| Mood: | depressive |
| Type: | Diary entry |
| Added: | September 21st 2006, 05:49:44 |
| Visits: | 1648 |
| Series: | [ The Less ] |
| Rating: | 4/5 (Votes: 4) |
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Description:
Five months was far too long a time without writing anything depressive. And I hate logics. It's the middle of the night, and I needed to write something.
I can live without all the material stuff. If I found enough rest elsewhere I could live without anything else. And then I'm told that I shouldn't complain about life because I have enough material stuff. I should burn it all, then burn them all, and then burn myself.
I should, but that's relative.
Note: After re-reading this text I found several similarities with muddasheep "Remains" songs. It's the fact I was listening to them while typing. I'm sorry for that if it gives anyone any inconvenience.
Second Note: After being just ready to post it, I found these quotes from Carl Sagan.
"We make our world significant by the courage of our questions and by the depth of our answers."
And I don't think I'd like to try imagining the kind of depressive thoughs he must have. This one here is already pretty down-getting:
The truth may be puzzling. It may take some work to grapple with. It may be counterintuitive. It may contradict deeply held prejudices. It may not be consonant with what we desperately want to be true. But our preferences do not determine what's true. |
 The No then The Yes. The Yes then The No. The No or The Yes. The Yes and The No. The No if and only if The Yes. Does it matter? If Death's the only absolute.
Do I want to die? Sure. Do I want to live? Not at all. Then why am I still living? Why am I still on my feet, still here? Is this Will or Fear? You tell me... If Death's the only absolute.
Life sucks in yet so many ways. I don't wanna be rich. I wanted to be wise, just stopped caring on the way. Do I want to be happy? Never. Happiness would be far too simple and I'm far too selfish for that. I still prefer to die knowing than to live happily in ignorance. Yet Knowledge, Ignorance, Good and Evil don't mean anything. Nothing at all. If Death's the only absolute.
So I wonder, have I lived enough? Have I loved enough? Have I known enough? Of course not. Then why would I stop? Because I don't care anymore... If Death's the only absolute.
I can't smile. Only cry. Tears for what was, is and will be. Tears for what wasn't, isn't and just won't be. My smile is irony. My optimism is sarcasm. Reality just flows away. If Death's the only absolute.
There's not such thing as Skepticism, just because there's nothing to be skeptic about. Everything that exists is a joke. The saddest joke we are aware of. And being aware of it just spoils the fun of it. Because awareness is awareness of death. And Death's the only absolute.
Death Is the only absolute.
Else I've found a sadder joke. |
GeeZeR
September 21st 2006, 13:07:14
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WTF? Leave this baby talks about death and suicide for stupid teens-goths and go find some work!  |
Ren
September 21st 2006, 19:07:11
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DeathMinstrel,
You fail at life.
Period. |
muddasheep
September 21st 2006, 19:07:38
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| don't mind deathminstrel, lord, he doesn't know what he's writing. |
GeeZeR
September 21st 2006, 20:25:14
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[]_, ([]) []_, !!!
Kids, welcome to the real life!!!!!!!!!
Of course, you can suicide yourself... Who will be the first? |
Pyroclasm
September 21st 2006, 20:58:10
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So who are you calling kids? You act like your about 12 years old.
/ontopic
Death isn't the only absolute Asriel, there's always taxes as well.
But seriously, you seem to think that life is a joke, a very sad joke. That's true, and anyone who sees life as something other than pure entertainment is missing the point. So instead of moping around, you could try to find something that makes you happy. It doesn't matter if it's a person, an activity, or something else, just find something and work at it.
Sorry to be harsh, but self-pity never got anyone anywhere. Instead of focusing on all the bad things in life, try to find something about life that you like. Don't say that you dislike everything, because there is always something that you like.
Happiness is not simple, it is the hardest thing to come by in this world, and the secret to obtaining it is different for each person. For me, it's my writing, for Muddasheep, it seems to be his music. Try to find the secret to your happiness, and then just hold on to it.
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LordAsriel
September 21st 2006, 23:19:19
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@DeathMinstrel: who do you think you're talking to?
@Ren: ...
@muddasheep: I'll try to.
@Pyroclasm: Well, thanks. That's a perspective I hadn't intended to look before. I was (I am) living by Inertia. I'll think about it. |
SonOfMan
June 08th 2016, 13:46:36
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> Try to find the secret to your happiness
For me it's my goldfish Sam and his collection of crazy hats. I just wish he wasn't a drunk who picked fights with octopuses (octopi?) whenever we go to a bar. Sam, the fish, is always telling me he doesn't fit in, every time he starts drinking I hear about this person not liking him, that person says this about him. He's really insecure, even for a goldfish. He brings up the same stories tima and again, like he just can't let some things go, you know? Honestly, how does he even remember this stuff? He talks about feeling alienated no matter where he is. I guess he's just a fish out of water.
I'm going to let the cat in, we'll see who's got problems now, Sam, you god damned whiny fucking goldfish. How does he even get the hats on? He has no arms. Bastard fuck shit piss and bollocks. I'm getting a koi pond. |
Egi_RaZoRZ
January 13th 2017, 05:38:58
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(A bit late lol)
I don't think there's self-pity, from a certain angle that is - we need to focus on the bad things too, I got rid of chronic depression by doing that now and then  - Life is not what it seems always, nice text. Obviously, I did something about it in this way, though, so yeah it is different for everyone I guess. I fight fire with fire but I agree, there is much illusion and illusion can be great - imagination is power, after all, and sometimes it all feels like one giant illusion lol. Yeah.
Me I think I.T. and virtual reality are thus fun to explore.  Might as well get busy workin' on the magic! Death rules! lol 
*runs away like a little kid*
...
*however stumbles on peculiar octopodes, lying near the burnt Throne Room for a mysterious reason* |
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GeeZeR
Ren
muddasheep
Pyroclasm
SonOfMan
Egi_RaZoRZ
